Oprah and the chump

I saw this link off of CNN.com (I don't keep up with Oprah, trust me).

http://www.cnn.com/2007/LIVING/personal/06/29/stay.or.go/index.html

The article recaps 5 women's decisions about whether to leave or stay with their men. Some of the situations are obvious - repeated infidelity, men with emotional problems, etc.

However, the last situation detailed is the one that ALL MEN need to learn to avoid. This man obviously failed to spark passion or gain the respect of being "a man" from his wife. What seems key to me is her comment "He didn't fight it". This guy was obviously not being a man. He was not leading the relationship or even taking an equal part. I am speculating of course but he was probably perfectly content in the fact that he got a hot woman to marry him and supplicated himself to her so that she would be happy and wouldn't leave him. However, in doing that, he failed to build attraction and lost her anyway.

Don't ever be fat, dumb and happy in a relationship or you risk losing it.

After Sarah's first date with Richard, she didn't plan on seeing him again. But after getting fired from her job and facing a July 4 weekend alone, she called him back. "I was very lonely and insecure -- and unlucky in love," she says. "I thought he was as good as it would get for me."

They married, moved from Manhattan to Santa Barbara and started a family. "My life seemed full, but it wasn't. I didn't love my husband," she says. "I faulted myself for not liking him more -- he was a good man, but he was dull."

One night, Sarah came home late, exhausted and looking for comfort. Instead, she found her husband and two children asleep in her bed -- leaving no room for her. After putting her kids to bed, she decided that she couldn't pretend anymore. "My husband initiated sex," Sarah recalls. "And I started crying. He asked, 'What's wrong?' I said, 'I don't want to do this anymore.'" He didn't fight it.

"I had finally found the courage to leap," she says.

Sarah signed up for Match.com several months after the split. Through Match, Sarah met Adam, who she married in 2000. Their relationship isn't perfect -- "we have disagreements that leave me frustrated -- but I feel passionate about him. That's the big difference."