LR: BJ lessons aka messed up a 3some

What a crazy day!

I was very productive Saturday and was able to accomplish a lot of things on my "list of things to do" which put me in a very good, accomplished mood.

For Saturday night, I didn't have any set plans but had tentatively set it up to go out with Sinn.

About 3pm I get a text from a stripper I have been talking to off and on for a year. She found me on myspace a while ago. We communicated via myspace for quite some time and eventually met face to face a couple of times. We always met up in a big group so we hadn’t had much one-on-one time. I eventually asked her to lunch several months ago. There was chemistry and I found her attractive but shortly after lunch, she accidentally sent me a text she meant for her friend that said something along the lines of “This one is a keeper. I am going to take it slow and do it right with this one” I was very clear from the beginning that I am not boyfriend material so I cut back on our communications and haven’t seen or spoken to her in about 4 months.

She text me "Just getting out of the shower. I am naked and horny. I haven't had sex in months"

There is always a debate in my mind on how to react when directly confronted with sex. It’s almost like a poker game of sorts…..do you ‘fold’ and go for it and risk them bluffing and you seeming too eager or do you call them on their ‘bluff’ and play hard to get. I normally go with hard to get.

I text her back "Quit bothering me with your problems =)"

She text me "Are you gay? Most guys would be asking for directions to my house already"

I text back "I am not that easy or like most guys. Definitely not gay"

She immediately calls me. She tells me she wants to see me. I tell her I am busy running errands but I might be able to make time for her later however, it is a Saturday and I have plans for the evening. She again calls me gay and reiterates that most guys would drop everything and come right over if she offered them sex.

I tell her that I have more options than most guys and plan my dates around my life, not the other way around.

She asks when the last time I had sex was. I tell her that the question was way too personal. She stays on the subject and I eventually tell her "last night" (which was true). She mentions that she didn't know I had a girlfriend. I tell her I don't.

She accuses me of being a player. I say "sure I am, but you still like me". She agrees and tells me she wants to come over and see me.

I tell her that I am in the middle of something but will call her in a bit. I finish up my errand I was in the middle of, take a shower and then text her my address. I don't hear back from her but assume she is on her way.

30 minutes later, there is a knock on my door. She is wearing this cute little sun dress and looks HOT!!!

She has this mischievous gleam in her eye as she walks past me, hops up on my kitchen counter and stares at me. I have this gut feeling that I should just walk up and start making out with her but instead, I sort of chicken out and ask her if she wants a drink.

She says she wants a chocolate martini so I make her a very strong one. She downs it in seconds and asks for another. I am still pouring myself a drink and start laughing. It is obvious she is looking for an "excuse" for whatever happens while she is at my house. I KNOW I am in and decide to slow play it.

I finish pouring my drink, make her another and invite her to join me on my love seat. She does. She has one of her legs flung over mine and I have my arm around her when she abruptly gets up and moves several feet away to my couch.

WTF!

I of course don't let it show that it phases me. She suggests a movie and gets up and looks though my collection. She chooses a sappy one and we barely watch it as we talk and get to know each other better.

Sexual framing is the name of the game however, the more I frame, the more her body language gets protective. She eventually ends up curled up with a pillow clung to her chest which is obvious protective body language.

I feel I have 3 options at this point - I can plow through it, I can pull back, or I can call her on it.

Never being one to back down, I call her on it.

I abruptly tell her that I expected so much more from her the way she built up this visit but am now realizing that she is all talk. A “challenge” if you will…..

She admits she is being reserved. We talk about why and she says that I intimidate her for some reason. I can barely stop laughing because I feel that I am anything but intimidating. She says that I am too comfortable in my own skin and it makes her nervous. This is a compliment of sorts, I guess.

I don't back down and again accuse her of being all talk. I know she is a stripper. She has mentioned before that her "hat trick" is a girl-on-girl show which is how she makes the majority of her money. She has made it clear that she is experimental and is bi-sexual - what gives? Why is she being reserved with me?

She asks for another drink and lets me know that this one will make her drunk as she is a lightweight - again providing excuses for her behavior. I make us each another drink and then try to join her on the couch.

She is being very shy for some reason.

Just then, her best friend, another stripper calls. As they are talking, I start interrupting the call about how shy my girl is. I am teasing her through the phone to her best friend.

Her friend is eating it up and demands to talk to me. I get her on the phone and we both start making fun of how shy my stripper is. I again accuse her of being all talk. My stripper is trying to defend herself but her friend and I are both playfully slamming on her.

My stripper eventually gets up, pulls up her dress and proves to me that she is not wearing any panties. Nice! She also tells me she was hoping that I attacked her right when she walked in the door. She then tells me to open her purse. I do and right at the top is a pink plastic bag. She tells me to open it and inside is a condom she just purchased. She then demands to know if I still think she is all talk. I say "yes, for sure!" very sarcastically.

The friend, who is already driving to my house, tells my stripper, through me, that if she really wants to turn me on, she needs to drop my pants and start giving me a blow job. My girl exclaims that she is horrible at giving head. We both start making fun of her and I warn her that I am going to buy her a book about giving head.

We continue to pick on my stripper while the friend on the phone drives to my place. She eventually shows up and I also make her a drink.

By this time, I have a good buzz, my stripper is hammered and the friend has a lot of catching up to do….

I again bring it to a sexual frame and we end up talking about blow jobs. The friend really loves giving head and again encourages my stripper to go down on me. It takes a lot of teasing, more drinks and some encouragement but she eventually gives in and starts giving me a blow job with her friend watching.

My stripper is giving me head while the other one, who refuses to join in, is giving my stripper advice, rubbing my ass, massaging my neck, scratching my back and generally adding to the experience.

During this time, I am getting texts from Sinn and my buddy Vodka. Of course it is rude as hell but I am responding to their texts while she is going down on me.

My girl is really, really bad about giving head. I start to laugh and make fun of her. This is done in a teasing way – not malicious. All three of us are laughing at the situation and having a good time about it. Never in my life have I dreamed I would be making fun of a stripper while her mouth is on my dick, I am texting my buddies and her friend is watching. Incredible!

Her friend keeps giving her advice but it is a lost cause. It just isn’t going to happen for me. She needs some serious help!

This goes on for a while but all of us have commitments for the evening so she eventually stops, they leave and I text Vodka to come pick my drunk ass up.

He shows up and we text Sinn who texts back gibberish. It is only 10:30 so he either got an early start or is preoccupied with some hottie.

Vodka and I head to a club which is supposed to be new and happening but is dead. We each slam our drink and head to another bar which is inconsistent but when it is on, has some of the hottest women I have ever seen gathered in one place. This night it is on.

I declare a personal goal to integrate myself into this place. I am already in with the bouncers and Vodka already knows the owner. It should be easy. However, this club is very clique-ish so I have a challenge ahead of me. There are just so many hotties in this place that I gotta gain social status somehow…..

Vodka and I proceed to drink large amounts of alcohol and hit on a few hotties with poor results. We haven’t seen each other in a while so we are doing more catching up than flirting which is all good.

I get a few texts from Stripper while we are out asking me to join up with them. I ignore the texts as I have already told her I have plans for the evening, no matter how flimsy they were.

Jump forward to closing time….. I am drunk and horny from getting a partial blow job earlier in the day. I start randomly texting all my usual girls but for some reason, they all blow me off for the evening. The stars have aligned to curse me I believe.

Vodka drives my drunk ass home and as we are pulling into my driveway, I get a text from Stripper wanting to know if her and her friend can sleep in my bed with me. I text back “sure” and invite Vodka in to be my wingman.

We go inside and cook up some cheap ass frozen appetizers I have while I pour us another drink. The girls arrive and shots start flowing. Vodka, who isn’t physically attractive at all, is one of the best people I know for sexual framing. He can say the most obnoxious things that would get anyone else slapped yet gets a laugh out of it every time. He is being his typical self and gets the girls all worked up. We start talking about blow jobs and spanking so he whips off his belt and starts spanking the girls. The girls are totally into it and tell him to spank them harder.

Within about 30 minutes of talking to them, Vodka grabs the friend and goes upstairs. My stripper and I start making out – the first time we have every kissed and we decide to go upstairs too. It turns out, Vodka and his girl are on my bed and my girl throws them out. They go back downstairs to my couch.

Within minutes, we hear slapping sounds, moaning and the couch pounding against the wall. They are getting it on.

My girl tells me that I really dropped the ball. She says her friend was so turned on watching her give me a blow job that she wanted to join in at the time. However, she was hesitant because she didn’t know how into me my stripper was so she just watched. They later debriefed and my girl gave her permission to join in. When they text me that they wanted to sleep over, they were planning on a three-some. FUCK! I blew it. She is getting her release from Vodka instead……

Listening to them go at it, my girl and I realize we are moving too slow so she throws a condom on me and we go to town. However, she is too drunk to really work it and I am too drunk to really care so we decide to raincheck for the morning, call it quits and go to sleep.

I wake up in the morning ready to go. I throw on a condom, wake her up and definitely make up for the night before.

I later debrief with Vodka. He said his girl was a total freak! He violated his girl every which way to Sunday. She begged him to give her a grand finale by painting her face.

All in all a good day!